Tag Archives: song

Love is a four-letter word

Love is a four-letter word

Love is a four-letter word,

though It’s not the worst that I’ve heard;

some of the other four-letter words, they’re no so nice,

they’re bland and boring, set me snoring, are similar to wood, and just like rice.

Just like rice

Just like rice

they are bland and boring

just like R.I.C.E. Rice.

I met a man from China

I made him lovely food,

he said my fayre was awful

I thought that that was rude;

I told him he was ungrateful

I think I told him twice;

he just looked at me,

and said ‘I just like rice.’

Just like rice,

Just like rice;

that little man

looked up to me

and told me

he liked R.I.C.E. Rice.

There is… always a train.

There is… always a train

… always a train;

in every episode of Poirot;

well, in most of them,

I should say.

Time and time again

we see Hercule

upon a train,

waving goodbye to,

or greeting one

in a Herculean way.

‘There’s always a train

Mm-hmm, there’s always a train

Always, always (always a train)‘*



always a train.

*from Always The Sun by The Stranglers

I’m Not Shakespeare – a song (W.I.P.)

I’m Not Shakespeare – a song (W.I.P.)

I’m not Shakespeare

But, I’m the closest thing you’ve got;

My name’s not William

but I write an awful lot

just like he did

when he was alive;

I’m not Shakespeare

and my latest work

is Veronese Gentlemen 5.

I was…

I was drowning when I wrote this,

please excuse me if the words are blurred…

I was there at Bosworth Field

when I waved ‘goodbye’ to Richard the Third.

I was lonely as a cloud

approached me and it asked the way;

I didn’t know where I was,

so I sent him off to Carbis Bay.

Peanut Butter

Peanut Butter

I saw the peanut butter

I saw it on a shelf

I took the peanut butter

and I ate it all myself;

I loved that peanut butter

I finished it all right up;

now I look for peanut butter

in a peanut butter cup.

“Veg an’ Two Veg, please?”

“Veg an’ Two Veg, please?”

When there is one last fish in an ocean,

One last cow in a field;

will the people then have a notion,

that the cost was worth more than the yield.

When there are no more Dodos in Tesco;

when a shamb shank is all that they sell;

when your mixed-up grill,

is just a mixed-up girl,

packing your biscuits in twos –


‘and the animals went

in two-by-twos…

… and there were none of them left in the morning’.

A very short song about the plight of carrots and parsnips in water.

A very short song about the plight of carrots and parsnips in water.

It’s in standard tuning and uses the chords Gmaj / Cmaj / Gmaj, even though it is quite a sad song.

G is the Root Note (as is C)

If you use drop D tuning it sounds slightly like Nickleback.

Here it is:



Singing: carrots sink…

Cmaj Gmaj

and parsnips float.

You can let the final Gmaj on ‘float’ ring to extend the song for a few seconds more – or not, if you are stuck for time.