Tag Archives: #SillyNonsense

My phone died

My phone died –

so, I buried it;

then somebody said,

‘It was probably

just the battery.’


So, I dug it up –

it was covered in mud;

it didn’t look pretty,

and it didn’t respond to flattery.


So, I cleaned it up,

and I plugged it in,

and it came back to life-

a miracle! A resurrection!


So, I charged it up

and I made a call

to a man in Milan

who pointed me in a circumspect direction.


So, I went there,

and lost my phone there,

should have taken more care there,

I’ve never been that good

at looking after number one –

and here you should say, ‘There, there.’

But, probably, you won’t.

Procrastination Haiku (W.I.P.)

I was going to

write a haiku about Pro—

Reality Cheque

I received

a reality cheque

through the post once.

It was back-dated,


and obviously o Freudulent slip.

I framed it,

as it had hoped to frame me,

and it was convicted, sentenced,

hung on a wall,

until it no longer breathed

the truth.

Corncrakes for breakfast

I had corncrakes

for breakfast this morning;

they were pleasant enough company,

but they flew away

when they

saw that I had burnt the toast


Coast Guard postcard

I sent a Coast Guard through the post –

it should’ve been a postcard;

but, that’s the way my cookie crumbles.

Recipe idea #1

Add half a glass of hot water

to half a glass of cold water

to get a full glass of tepid water.

Simple ideas are the best.