Tag Archives: #Seagulls

A seagull?

I saw a gull above the sea,

but not a seagull he, or she;

they tell me there is no such thing,

they are all just gulls upon the wing

Three Gulls

Three gulls,

sea gulls,

stood on a wall;

each one hungry,

shrilly they call.


Observant, aware,

waiting opportunity

to grab a tasty morsel,

a chip or a tuna tea.


Some love them,

some hare them,

but highly I rate them the most,

the seaside patrollers,

of Cornwall’s fair coast.

If only… (blast from the past)

Any illustrious illustrators out there able to draw the safety headwear that I have created below? There will be a free cream tea in it for you.

My task is to create a device for the safe eating of pasties in Seagull-occupied areas.

If only I was an inventor…

And not a writer.

A hood
Might be good
With an area covered
Safe from attack
From the front
And the back.

With a space for the pastie to be held;
Like those masks
Of those people that weld;
But, with a little more space
For the pasty to face
One’s face.

Perhaps with a shelf inside
To rest the pasty
Between bites;
And maybe a light
For eating pasties at night.

What about a plastic Eagle
Perched upon the crown?
Seeing one of those might
Cause the seagull to think twice
About swooping down.

A Golden Eagle
With flapping wings
That you could operate
With carefully positioned strings.
And mirrors like you get on a Mod’s Lambretta
To allow for approaching seabird vigilance.

Thinking along these lines
Makes me feel better
That the ‘gulls can be deterred;
They won’t beat my Super-Gull-Proof Helmet;
They’re not that clever a bird…
Are they?

One hundred colourful seagulls

One hundred colourful seagulls

stormed the Devon coast,

not after your chips,

your ice-creams,

your early morning toast;

no, just after your interest,

your looks, and kindly words,

for, after all, they are so like

the loveliest of birds.




NB ‘Wonky Words’ which features more like this is available now at all good Amazons (other Rivers and Rainforests are available).

Seagulls Scoffle

Seagulls scoffle,

with ne’er a thought

given to etiquette.

It is ‘first come, first served’,

‘When it’s gone it’s gone’,

and, ‘First to the feast

won’t get the least’,

where gulls are concerned.

These truisms are learned in the nest,

and the rest is history.

Fields full of seagulls

Fields full of seagulls;

and, when I say full,

I do not mean full;

but, there were quite a few;

and we are nowhere near the sea,

Between you and me,

I think that the seagulls have kidnapped the cowls,

or are their stunt doubles,

when time allows,

Or they are just standing in

whilst the cows go down the pub,

metaphorically speaking – rub-a-dub-dub.

The seagulls are in the field, of my vision,

and I can take nothing for granted.

Where did all the seagulls go?

When I took the picture

I left plenty of room

for the poem

that would accompany it.

When I took the other picture

I left plenty of room

for the seagull

that would inhabit it.

I didn’t take any more pictures,

as I’d left plenty of room

for improvement.

Six seagulls in Morrisons car park

Six seagulls in Morrisons car park!

That’s six in number,

and not sexy gulls!


they were patiently waiting

for a bite to eat,

pacing nonchalantly

on their twelve gull feet;

calling to each other with the latest news;

and hoping for a morsel

to light the fuse.

Seagulls – the look

It’s not how you look at seagulls,

It’s how they look at you

that matters.

They eye you up and down

as you walk past

in their quaint old seaside town.

They quantify and justify

the food that you may hold;

and then they make their strike plan –

would that we should be so bold.

They carry out attacks

to gain their food of choice,

we stand there stunned,

bereft of lunch,

and then we hear their voice:

“Pob-a-Bob!” or “Bob-Pob!”

or some such likened yell;

a laugh they have that mocks us,

but, at least we have a tale to tell.

Never share your lunch with a seagull,

Never share your lunch with a seagull

never even offer him a bite;

never share your lunch with a seagull,

because you know he just might…


take more than his fair share,

he might just take the lot;

and when you look at what he’s left you

you might not have a jot.