Tag Archives: #Pasty

The Seagull Espies

The Seagull Espies

A seagull espied my pasty today;

I saw him; then he saw me, he looked away;

he circled around to take me unaware;

but, I, my pasty, was unwilling to share, so I followed his path,

kept a watch on his place;

he thought for a while,

then a smile came to his face –

and he flew off.

A minute later, there was a cough

right behind me, I turned to look,

a decoy, I beheld, the oldest trick in the book;

and there was my pasty,

gone, in the blink of an eye –

and the two hungry seagulls

laughed, and I did cry.

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Pasty Party

Pasty Party

They held a Pasty Party,

but nobody came;

the flyers said ‘Party Party,

which really isn’t the same.

Gyrate My Pasty

Gyrate My Pasty

Spin it round

like a record;

make it move in circular ways;

when it returns to the beginning

it can walk as if in a daze;

revolutions in ‘33, ‘45 or ‘78

overthrew the governance,

and now the pasty

must run to ketchup.

Tate My Pasty @RateMyPasty

Tate My Pasty @RateMyPasty

Upon a canvas

to behold

is a Cornish Pasty,

ancient, old;

full of promise

that never came.

“Pasty cold , or piping hot?” @RateMyPasty

“Pasty cold , or piping hot?” @RateMyPasty

Rate my pasty

from one to ten –

or from onan to deg

if you like.

Berate my pasty

if you dare,

it should only be mine

to celebrate

or discard in Liskeard

in despair.

Integrate a Devon pasty?

Infiltrate, I think not.

No, furnish me

with Cornish fare

crimped to the side

and leave me there

to contemplate

the meal’s sad fate;

my Cornish Pasty

I here await.

Upon Seagulls

Upon Seagulls

A seagull laughed at me once;

then laughed at me many times;

but, I wasn’t going to be mocked,

by a seagull;

ideas to my mind soon flocked,

and I knew that I could get back at that gull

within the depths of my rhymes:

“A seagull had a silly laugh,

all the grace of a drunken giraffe;

a habit of being particularly nasty

to a tourist and his pasty;

pinching food with out a qualm;

then perching at a height, so calm;

enjoying its ill-gotten fare

then repeating the feat without a care.”

Oh, that didn’t really seem to work;

I made the gull seem cool,

myself a berk.

It’s hard to mock the feathered ones

that pinch your pasties, nick your buns;

I hear their laughter overhead,

and flinch at them in utter dread.

“Hot Pasties Ahead!”

“Hot Pasties Ahead!”

Hot Pasties in a lay-by;

10am to 2pm.

Cornish provender

for the hungry traveller,

and if you missed the opportunity

to feed your Cornish needs,

there’s another Pasty lay-by

wherever this road leads.