Tag Archives: #Grammar

“The Interrobang?!”

I’d never heard

of this strange, strange word;

until I had –

and then it blew my mind.

.

“Blew your mind?!” you ask,

as you unscrewed your flask

of cold, cold tea.

.

“Yes!” I replied,

as I considered the tide –

coming in? Or going out?

“Is it coming in?!”

I shout.

.

Your tea imbibed,

upon a piece of parchment you scribed

the word, ‘Idiot’.

.

At least I tried.

The Trouble With Collective Nouns (as I see it)

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The trouble with collective nouns

The trouble is that they gang up on you
When you least expect it

A flock of doodahs swoop in and harass you,
A patter of pets await your return home after a long, hard day at the office
A vacuum cleaner of dogs is hungry to eat your tea – and often it does.
A brief of deer run across the road ahead of you, fleeting and gone before you get a good look.
A circumnavigate of cows blocks your way when you are rambling across any moor you can name (and some you can’t).

And a finality of writers and readers (combined for once) await your ending, praying that you go out with a crescendo of bangs.