Tag Archives: #FF

The gull and the magpie

The gull and the magpie were deep in conversation

Magpie: Well, there is a song about Magpies.

Gull: indeed. Someone once wrote a book with a gull as the title character.

Magpie: And there is another song about Magpies.

Gull: Two songs! Wow! But… every song there is, that ever was, that has ‘girl’ in the title can be sung using the word ‘gull’ instead. Lots of songs.

Magpie: Really. I think most birds have a song or two written about them: Nightingales, Robins, Eagles, Albatrosses (or Albatrossi), Blackbirds, Magpies, so, it’s nothing special.

Gull. True. But the numbers do favour gulls: ‘Gulls just want to have fun’, ‘It’s different for gulls’, ‘Some gulls’, ‘Gulls, gulls, gulls’, and so on.

Magpie: But Magpies are ‘pies’ and everybody loves pies.

Gull: Maggoty Pie? I think not. Everybody loves gulls.

Magpie: I don’t think that ‘everybody’ does love gulls – have you seen all the signs at the seasides and the quaysides? ‘Don’t feed the Seagulls – they are vicious!’

Gull: No such thing as a seagull. We are all just gulls of the sea. Anyway, we’ve just had a bad press. It’s not as if ‘we’ can put up signs saying, ‘Watch out for the people – they are liable to be vicious if you take their ice-creams or pasties!’

They are holding those things aloft for us, and then they get all upset when we accept their offerings. People are so very stupid.

Magpie: You are very persuasive, gull; and, yet, I do believe that Magpies have had (and do have) more poems written about them: ‘Magpie in a Rainbow’, ‘Magpie up a tree’, ‘The Magpie’, and hundreds more!

Gull; Maybe even a dozen.

Magpie: ‘A gull a day keeps the tourist away’:

Gull: You made that up!

Magpie: some of it. But, I dare say there are many more in that vein.

Gull: Probably. I must say that I do ike you, Magpie.

Magpie: Magpies are very likeable birds, once you get to know them.

Gull: As are gulls.

Magpies: unless you’ve ever lost your ice-cream or pasty to one.

Gull: True, very true.

Long story, short (as in LOTR)

They travelled far, reached their destination, carried out their task, returned.

One-liner Wednesday – The Wall

When I passed that way again, it was with some surprise that I noticed that the brick wall – with whom I had quite recently conversed so eloquently – had been replaced by a far less loquacious empty space.

One-liner Wednesday prompt here.

I was talking to a brick wall

I was talking to a brick wall: we were having quite a conversation. It seemed that the brick wall had seen all manner of humanity pass by.

‘But-‘ said the brick wall, ‘the writing is on the wall for humankind.’ I laughed uneasily, though I was inwardly cringing, and turned to leave.

‘Fare thee well!’ called the wall after me.

‘Without turning, I waved an arm and hand in gesture. ‘To the next time!’ I called.

But, the next time I passed that way, the wall was not in evidence. I paused a while, considering the situation.

I left, with a hesitant determination, to obtain my place of travail; but, my head long after dwelt upon the conundrum.

Perhaps the writing had been on the wall… for the wall.

The cat the rat and the acrobat

‘Rat-a-tat-tat!’ said the cat.


‘Are you calling me tatty?’ asked Ratty.


‘No. I just want to come in.’ replied Cat.


‘And once you’re in, you’ll want to go out.’ added Ratty.


‘Yes.’ affirmed the cat. ‘It’s what I do.’


Ratty opened the door. Cat came in. Ratty closed the door.


‘I’ll just wait here by the door then, shall I?’ asked Ratty, dryly.


‘If you would.’ purred Cat. And to herself, ‘It’s so nice having servants.’


Ratty’s eyes followed the retreating Cat.


The acrobat just listened and silently watched, whilst hanging upside down from a beam.


“…. and as many carrots as you can eat!”

“Well, that wouldn’t be that many.”

“Three or four do you?”

“I should say so!”

“We could put them in a cake.”

“Whole? Or crunched?”

“Common consensus has it that grated is best.”

“That makes sense. Okay, I’ll go for the ‘Cake with Carrots In’.”

“I think it’s called a Carrot Cake.”

“Well, whatever it’s called, put me down for one with an option on further ‘Carrot Cakes’ in the future.”

Writing and Reading (at this moment in time)

At this moment in time,

I have posted upon WordPress

for one hundred and twenty-one

days in a row.

I have also read from my Kindle

for the past twenty-six days

(I miss a day, occasionally)

but, I have also read from my Kindle

for the past sixty-four weeks

(I miss a week ‘very’ occasionally).


I might have to thank a long list of authors,

and be thankful to a huge number of inspirational moments for the above,

but this is no place for speeches,

or peaches, as each is

inevitably, or invariably,

too long, under, or over ripe,

and very rarely at the correct

length, or ripeness for public proclamation.

As you can see from the above, writing is a thing.

Make of that what you will.

Drabble-time? 100 word story.

As far as it goes there are no rules; but, only as far as it goes. I tell you this in all confidence, but, if it should go any further… well, let me leave that unspoken.

Between Earth and Mars there are only eighty-four hours of travel, or is that eighty-four days? I always get the two mixed up. Without easy access to a timetable I’m not that sure when the next shuttle is due, or when it would be arriving at the Red Planet. There’s also the problem that there might be a need to change shuttles along the way.

The Old Man and the Tree

“I have never ever hugged a tree. I haven’t even been tempted to. And, in that sort of ball-park, I have never ever wanted to hold hands with a grandfather clock, or cuddle up close to a Lavender bush.”

The tree cried a little, all it needed was a hug.

The Old Man and the Key

“I still have my voice. I used to sing in the choir… when I was younger. A lovely boy soprano I was… when I was much younger. It’s not as high as it used to be… it’s much, much lower. Less piercing. And only brought out at parties.

My trouble seems to be a lack of perfect pitch – more Sunday League than Wembley. And I prepare myself to sing, and it’s like being on my doorstep – I can’t find my key, and even if I do, I just stand there not knowing if it’s safe to go in.

That’s an old joke – even older than I am – and I tell it very badly. As they say…

… timing, is everything.”