Tag Archives: #Cake

Carrots

“…. and as many carrots as you can eat!”

“Well, that wouldn’t be that many.”

“Three or four do you?”

“I should say so!”

“We could put them in a cake.”

“Whole? Or crunched?”

“Common consensus has it that grated is best.”

“That makes sense. Okay, I’ll go for the ‘Cake with Carrots In’.”

“I think it’s called a Carrot Cake.”

“Well, whatever it’s called, put me down for one with an option on further ‘Carrot Cakes’ in the future.”

Cakery, not a bakery.

“Do you bake cakes?”

“Not all of them are baked”, you reply. “These cardboard ones are raw.”

“Fake cakes?!” I queried, using the interrobang with relish.

“Jake, our fake cake baker, makes them.”

“For goodness sake! Jake is your fake cake baker – that takes the biscuit.”

“He bakes those, too. Would you care to partake?”

“Have Cape – Will Fly!”

“Have Cape: Will Fly!”

“Have cake – staying firmly on the ground.”

That’s a thing, you see.

I changed one letter of a word

and a strange thing occurred.

“Cape – not Cake!”

or, more likely,

“Cake – not Cape!”

will be the brash slogan/s

of the future,

there for all to see,

whether hero or zero …

‘Hero – not Zero!”

or, more likely …

“Zero – not Hero!”

will also be up there

on the billboards

in letters twenty feet high!

Now wouldn’t that be a thing?

Always look beyond the cake

Always look beyond the cake,

there is more to life than cake;

there is sea and sun

and cake;

love and laughter

and cake;

family and friends

and cake.

Okay, there is cake

and other things, too.

I’m a Fruitcake (The Fruitcake Song)

I’m a Fruitcake (The Fruitcake Song)

I’m a fruitcake,

you’re a fruitcake,

everybody here is a fruitcake.

What does it take

to be a fruitcake?

Answer:

fruit and cake

put them together

and what does it make?

Walnut Cake

Walnut Cake

Walnut Cake

is a cake made of Walnuts

and various other ingredients;

but not coffee –

otherwise it would be a Coffee and Walnut Cake

(or, less often, a Walnut and Coffee Cake).

However, what goes nicely

with a slice of Walnut Cake

is a cup of coffee.

Metamorphacake

Metamorphacake

I awoke one day

to find

that I had turned into a cake.

Overnight, I had become various ingredients,

which were unceremoniously mixed, folded, beaten,

cooked in an oven

at a temperature unknown.

I awoke, and, later that day,

I was cut into slices

and eaten.