Tag Archives: #Alice

“Half-Baked Ukulele in a Red Wine Jus.”

“Half-Baked Ukulele in a Red Wine Jus.

The idea was simple. In fact, it was almost too simple for Alice to understand. If she drank from the bottle marked ‘Drink Me!’ she would shrink to a height of ten inches or so; if she then ate of the cake that was labelled ‘Eat Me!’ she would grow to fill all of the available (and some of the unavailable) space in the room.

However, there now appeared to be a third option. This was in the form of the arrival, as if by magic, of a small four-stringed instrument that made a strange ‘thrrrrrrrinnnng!’ sound when Alice ran her fingers across the strings. This instrument had a label attached to it with the words ‘Cook Me!’ written upon it.

And so Alice did.

Forty-five minutes later, Alice had concocted a dish that she liked to call ‘Half-Baked Ukulele in a Red Wine Jus’.

The taste was rather curious, decided Alice.


#5 in a series of 10, comically called, ‘Ten Creative Ways to ‘Literally’ Cook Your Ukulele.’

Nonsense Verse to a Random Tune

Nonsense Verse to a Random Tune


Popular Poetry put to a random melody


‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves

   Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;

All mimsy were the borogoves,

   And the mome raths outgrabe.’

I sang the words

to a random tune

and a fandom rune

did write itself.

I sang some more

and knew for sure

that quessom was thun

and lossles was never in venblun.

All through daynight

protessed the sight,

thou steam was seen arissen;

at breakfastdawn a birb was

merrilty lissome.

What Remains?


At a canter
my witty banter
Encroaches upon your mind
It goes in fast
But, will not last
For soon, it will unwind
And fade away
To leave nothing
But the memory of a Cheshire
Feline’s grin.