People seemed to like
my Monday Morning Haiku –
I wrote another.
.
‘another’
By the Book (sic)
By the Book (sic)
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Ghoul ash
The charred and papering remains
of a ghoul,
are not commonly known as ghoul ash;
no, some other thing
bears that name.
Our tortoise escaped
The other day,
our tortoise escaped;
we’d turned our backs
for no less than two minutes;
and that was when he saw his chance.
Through the open gate –
thank you, Postie –
and off up the road;
he led us a merry dance;
who’d have knowd
that a tortoise could reach
such velocity.
We think he was off to the beach, again ;
such precocity,
without a word of goodbye,
or a wave of farewell
(well,he might have waved,
it’s difficult to tell),
and he was gone,
up yon pavement,
(crossing at the crossing)
grabbing a leafy snack
at the passing allotment;
and, with no looking back,
he went off to the sands of the shore,
and the salt of the sea.
We couldn’t catch him;
but, he always comes home
in time for tea.
Mordor – on the Orient Express.
At the London ticket office.
‘No, you can’t get a ticket to Mordor – this train only goes to Venice.’
‘Venice? Can we change there for Mordor?’
‘You can certainly try.’
Posted in Poetry
Tagged #AgathaChristie, #Mordor, #OrientExpress, #poetry. #poem, #Tolkien, Dialogue
The (very tiny) elephant in the (very large) room
I, am just a tiny elephant,
and I, am hiding in a very large room,
hiding underneath a very shabby sofa,
I, am loitering in the gloom;
and no one knows I’m here;
and none have cause to fear,
and no one needs to talk about,,
the very tiny elephant
hiding in the gloom
under a very shabby sofa
in a very large room.
I’m a little Sea Slug
I’m a little sea slug
like my dad;
living off the Scilly Isles,
my life’s not bad;
came up here
from off the Spanish coast,
it’s difficult to say
which one I like the most.
.
Posted in Poetry
Tagged #CWT, #IslesofScillyWildlifeTrust, #poetry. #poem, #SeaSlug, Cornwall
A Labradobee
If you try
and cross
a Labrador
with a bee
you will just get
a confused Labrador
and a bee
that is so much crosser
than it ought to be.
Do you see?
I had rather—
I had rather hear a crow
bark at a dog,
than the other way round;
but, Shakespeare knew what he meant,
and I know him
better than he knows me.
Posted in Poetry
Tagged #BeatriceAndBenedict, #MuchAdoAboutNothing, #poetry. #poem, @Shakespeare
When there’s a bee in your beer
When there’s a bee in your beer
please remove it;
I know you’ll be left with an ‘r’,
but I think that is better by far.
If there’s a bee in your ear,
and it’s not that easy to hear;
well, that’s a different matter altogether.
Britain’s only spiny mammal
Britain’s only spiny mammal
is not an enamel camel,
doesn’t use a flannel,
and has never sat
as a member
of a disciplinary panel.
So, what is it? you ask.
It is, ‘the hedgehog’,
who hogs hedges,
avoids sledges
and precarious ledges;
and, when on its own,
always asks to be left alone
to do whatever it is
that a hedgehog does.
Why? Well, just because.
Graeme Sandford 