Welcome to Limericks – Day 12
We’ve had to take some from the shelve
We know that was wrong
It’s where they belong
And it’s from the shelf, not the shelve, we did delve!
-/-
As you can see we are no good at dates
It’s the thirteenth! We asked all our mates
Some did concur – “Yes, the 12th”
Others did blur “It’s probably, almost, quite likely the 12th)
But it ‘is‘ the 13th – as our calendar states!
-/-
The word of the day is… ‘bizarre!’
The wackiest, weirdest word by ‘so far’
It’s frenzied and whirly
frothy and curly
and drips pure bling and eats caviar.
-/-
It’s hard to ignore a Nora
If you do they may give you what for a
And, you never know,
If you pass £200, and don’t collect – Go!
You and she may end up the poorer.
-/-
On the banks of the O-hi-o
There’s a man from a travelling show
He’s paid the cost
Now he looks like he’s lost
All messed up, with nowhere to go.
-/-
There once was a McVicar named Dirk
Who wished that his name was Trevor
For Limericks called him a Burk
When in fact he was really rather clever…
And handsome… and he wrote poetry… at work… in the kirk… he did.
-/-
A Birmingham waiter named Stan
Was a very efficient man
“A table for two?
Will here do?”
Then he billed you before you began.
-/-
There was an old man called Dennis
Who visited the city of Venice.
He said: “Are you joking?
Your streets are quite soaking!”
Then shouted: “Your plumbing’s a menace!”
-.-
This Limerick has only one flaw
So, it’s no use looking for more
It’s slightly too short
of lines there are only four!
-/-
There was a young man name of Brian
Who went for a pizza: Hawaiian.
He had a stuffed crust –
When you’re hungry you must –
But his had a whole shepherd’s pie in.
-/-
A Limerick walked into a bar
“Ouch!” he cried – it was an iron bar!
-/-
In the year 2525
If man is still alive
Oops! Sorry! That’s a song!
-/-
#SeptemberLimericks
@infograe
#hangerfarmpoets
Graeme Sandford 