


The ‘Word of the Day’ it is… Disgraceful!
It is bad-manners whilst filling your face full
Of trifle and cake,
Cod fillet and hake,
And spraying the audience – is this graceful?
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A man from Cardigan did travel
In a jumper which did start to unravel
He headed due west
As he slowly undressed
And when got there… he was just in his vest!
(See what I did there – not many good rhymes for ‘Travel’ and I couldn’t fit ‘gravel’ in. G )
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The end
My friend
Near
Here
END!
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A man,
Called Stan;
Talked,
Walked,
Phoned his Nan.
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Whilst cycling through Stockton-on-Tees
A cyclist lost track of his knees
He got off his bike
And said: “I dislike
Limericks! Can I have them back, please”
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The centre of the Earth is quite hot
It is, believe it or not;
There is lava and such
Which is too hot to touch
And it’s a place where I’m glad I am not!
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A great idea for a Limerick came into my head
Last night, as I was just getting ready for bed;
“I’ll remember it tomorrow!” I thought;
But today, to my sorrow, there’s nought!
So, you are stuck with this other one instead
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The ‘Alternative Word of the Day’ it is… ‘glamour’
Which is truly fabulous to enamour;
Shiny and flash
You’ll cut a dash
If you just didn’t dress like your grammar.
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There was a man from Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch
Who lost his favourite sock
If it’s location you learn
Could you please return
It to him at no. 17 Church Place, Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch!
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The trouble with writing a Limerick
Is that they are over so very quick
They are too short
Teaching us nought;
Such as how a ‘Moon-Clock’ is known as a ‘Lunatic!’
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A Limerick bumped into a Bard
Who said “All your frivolity – discard!”
The Limerick sighed
And sadly replied:
“To be anything else would be hard.”
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This is an ‘ironic’, not an ‘iconic’ Limerick
A Limerick is not just five lines in an aabba rhyme scheme
It is a vocation, a calling, a future from a dream
There is no other that puts
It’s poetry into foots
In the way that a well-written Limerick does!
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A Limerick placed last in a list
Said: “I should really be first – I insist!”
But the writer was bland
To the Limerick’s demand;
“Last you will go, please desist.”
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