I juggled some oranges
Outside of Gorringes
In Lewes, near Brighton, one day
They said “What are you doing?
We thought you were queuing
to look at the lots, here today.”
I said, “It’s high time
The orange had a rhyme
And your auction house so fits the bill
So, I’m juggling fruit
In my very best suit
They said no one could do it –
But, I will!
Posted in hangerfarmpoets, poem, Poetry, russianroulette, washingmahine
Tagged #24, #hangerfarmpoets, #russianroulette, #washingmachine, Poem, Poems, Poetry
Walku 98 (Tennyson)
Vega:
“Water to the left…”
Haiku:
“Water to the right…”
Both:
“Into the puddles!”
-/-
Walku 99 (A Walk in the Woods)
Vega:
“Along forest paths
Through the winding woods we go…”
Haiku:
“Daddy will guide us.”
-/-
Walku 100 (Rover!)
Haiku:
“What’s ‘Roverandom?’ ”
Vega:
“It is a book by Tolkein.
It’s about a dog.”
–
Walku 101 (and Rover again!)
Haiku:
“What does this dog do?”
Vega:
“He has lots of adventures
And goes to the moon.”
–
Walku 102 (Rover and Out!)
Haiku:
“Is he big and brave?”
Vega:
“No, pint-size; he is tiny –
Smaller than you are!”
–
Walku 103 (And Really Out)
Haiku:
“It’s not ‘quantity’
It’s the quality that counts –
And it’s there ‘I’ win!”.
-/-
#puppy # puppies
Posted in #haikuthelabradoo, #vegathedoggerelpoet, #walkus, @poemmegroup, animals, dog, Dogs, Funny, graemesandford, Haiku, hangerfarmpoets, humour, infograe, labradoodles, pets, poem, poetical, Poetry, pup, puppies, puppy, Puppy Poem, puppypoem, puppypoems, pups
Tagged #dogs, #graemesandford, #haikuthelabradoo, #hangerfarmpoets, #puppies, #puppypoems, #Pups, #vegathedoggerelpoet, #walkus, @HolisticMoon, @poemmegroup, infograe
18th October
United Kingdom Haiku (not technically a country, but I thought that as it’s where I am – I would make an allowance).
United Kingdom
(Well, that is the first line done)
Green and pleasant land.
-/-
England Haiku
Where Angles once met
With the Saxons and did stay
It is not Saxland!
-.-
Ireland Haiku
Ireland, to be sure;
Emerald green and Guinness;
Top of the morning.
-/-
Scotland Haiku
Haggis; Robbie Burns;
Bagpipes and a warm sporran;
Porage with some salt.
-/-
Wales Haiku
Iechyd da! they greet us
Yakki Darr is what we hear;
Good Morning to you!
-/-
Northern Ireland Haiku
Lough Neagh at its heart;
Ship-building and the ‘troubles’
Bangor is pretty.
-/-
NB and if anybody would like me to put up a haiku of theirs for their country of the world (and we can put some up for states of America, counties of Uk and Ireland, etc.) let’s see how that goes, shall we? Graeme:) –
Further Reference to the Flags used can be sought here:
Though it may not be found there!
-/-
Posted in BigBangTheory, Eire, Flags, Funny, graemesandford, Haiku, hangerfarmpoets, humour, infograe, Ireland, poem, Poetry, Scotland, UK, UnitedKingdom, Wales, world, worldpoetryday, worldpoetryday2015, wpd, wpd2015
Tagged #Eire, #Flags#BigBangTheory, #graemesandford, #hangerfarmpoets, #Ireland, #NorthernIreland, #Scotland, #UK, #UnitedKingdom, #Wales, #world, #worldpoetryday, #wpd, @HolisticMoon, @poemmegroup, Haiku, humour, infograe, Poetry
Queuing Haikus (suggested by CFS) by Graeme Sandford
No. 1
“Dad? Are we there yet?”
Me: “Nearly; it’s not far now”
I lied; Then she cried.
-/-
No. 2
The heater it worked;
Hot air streaming out at me
as the engine boiled.
-/-
No. 3 (remembering I am in a long traffic queue driving in a car!)
A serene calm fell;
All around me there was peace –
As I fell asleep.
-/-
and follow it with another idea for a haiku that I have just had, entitled:
-/-
When the time I Have To Write Poetry is Short- I will write Haikus by Graeme Sandford
Which is also called (by me) the ‘Title Haiku‘ by Graeme Sandford
Title Haiku: is its also title;
But, this is is not the haiku that you were expecting:
That was in the title itself.
Such fun to play with a format or bend the rules a little. I am always up for having a playful go at tweaking my words to give added depth or meaning – or just because I am a cheeky type!
Seventeen syllables is a little short for some – it’s like being served up a polo mint (other mints are avilable) instead of the family roast you were expecting (just an example).
-/-
Posted in graemesandford, Haiku, hangerfarmpoets, poem, Poetry
Tagged #queues, @HolisticMoon, @PoemeGroup, Haiku, infograe, Poem, Poetry
Vega:
“Are we writing one?”
Haiku:
“National Poetry Day?”
Vega:
“It is.”
Haiku:
“Yes! One each!”
-/-
Vega:
“I can write haiku;
That are full of sweet phrases –
And still chase my tail!”
-/-
Haiku:
“The trees are all tall;
The river is wide and deep;
Why am I so small?”
-/-
Posted in #haikuthelabradoo, #vegathedoggerelpoet, graemesandford, Haiku, hangerfarmpoets, infograe, NationalPoetyryDay, NPD, poem, Poetry
Tagged #graemesandford, #haikuthelabradoo, #hangerfarmpoets, #kaiku, #nationalpoetryday, #NPD, #puppypoems, #vegathedoggerelpoet, #walkus, @HolisticMoon, @poemmegroup, infograe
Advertising my 15 Haiku Haiku
My 15 haiku –
in a neat and tidy post –
ready for your eyes!
-/-
Advertising my 15 Haiku Haiku 2
Fifteen of my best –
You should ‘not’ see the worst ones –
they are toe-curling!
-/-
-/-
Haiku Challenge: Eager
Eager the Beaver
Was no little deceiver –
Lied, cried; believe her?
-/-
Haiku Prompt: ‘Guessing Games’
“Are you an… aardvark?”
“Do I look like an ‘aardvark?’ ”
“Are you an… Igloo?
“…!”
-/-
Haiku Prompt: ‘Guessing Games’ 2
“My first is in…?”
“Jail!”
“And my second is in…?”
“Jail!”
“And my third…?”
“On bail!”
-/-
#ahaikufortwitter 2
“This one goes out to…
All of the two and one half
Followers I have!”
-/-
Angela van Son Haiku
Angela van Son
Follows me everywhere
on Twitter – Twit-who?
-/-
-/-
I went… and came back…
in the twinkling of an eye…
and before you knew.
-/-
-/-
Haiku Prompt ‘Starbucks’
“In Melbourne we sat
Outside of Starbucks and saw
All manner of souls!”
-/-
-/-
-/-
-/-
Posted in Funny, graemesandford, Haiku, hangerfarmpoets, infograe, poem, Poetry
Tagged #collectionofhaiku, #hangerfarmpoets, @baffled, @HolisticMoon, @poemmegroup, Haiku, infograe, Poem, Poetry
Early Limericks (c. 9th century) were written in manuscript form; with monks taking days and sometimes even weeks to inscribe the short poetic form with intricate details and embellish the pages that the Limerick’s words were set upon with accompanying decorative pictures. TRUE / FALSE
-/-
-/-
The City of Limerick in Eire (modern day Eire or Ireland) was named after the famous Erin Limerick (which is now housed in Limerick Cathedral), The Erin Limerick hails from the very earliest of recorded poetry in Eire / Ireland and is truly an awful poem at its best). TRUE / FALSE ?
-/-
The top of the world is quite old
And said to be terribly cold
But, what’s it to me
I’m unlikely to be
There for the climbers to behold.
-/-
The Limerick is the mightiest of beasts
Who does hold most uproarious feasts
They occur when the moon
Is eclipsed in late June
That’s if they’re not banned by the priests
-/-
The Limerick is one of the three ‘true’ forms of poetry as described by the Greeks in 321AD – Aclinius in his ‘History of the Ode’ was at pains to point out that the merit of a ferret in his trousers ‘was’ that it taught him to ‘bear it!’ as he writes it (and ‘the nipping of teeth’ at ‘what lay beneath’ really made a man of him… or not – the Ovidian transation from the old Greek to Latin and since then from Latin to English {Modern day English} is not one hundred per cent clear). The other two ‘true’ forms are, of course, the ‘Ode – in all its glory’, and the ‘Punning Couplet’ which is making a comeback in some literary circles. TRUE /FALSE ?
-/-
Almost lost is the fine art of spilling
I say this agen, wons moor, and with filling
So mop up your badd wisdom
With a spill-check sisdom
And the clarity it will soon be revilling!
-/-
The Ombazo Limerick was discovered in 1312 by the banks of the Ombazo River in Wasalla (modern day Umallawoo) by a Turkish merchant who thought that the stone upon which it was engraved was just a direction post for travellers. Copying down the details and then trying to follow them to get back to a main-trading route, he became irretrievably lost and the inscription parchment with him. The Limerick Stone has long been missing and it was only in 1847 that the remains of the traveller and the parchment were found – just north of Preston (modern day Preston). TRUE / FALSE ?
-/-
The ‘Alternative Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Drudge’
It’s when you have to eat fudge
Toffees and creams
Flavours from dreams
And your teeth, clamped together, won’t budge!
-/-
In Ireland upon St. Limerick’s day
In five lines the natives do pray
They recite then they laugh
About a telescopic giraffe
And then merrily go on their way.
-/-
The Limerick is also the most mathematical of poetic devices. It’s 8 letters relate strongly to themes of Infinity and the Mobius Strip whilst its 5 lines relate to the 5 good things a day that the Greek god, Vega, decreed that the peoples should aspire to – Swedish philosophers have marvelled at the simple, yet effective aabba rhyme scheme and this has also been noted by some of their most popular musicians. The ‘True’ Limerick also has a specific Gravity of 3.142 (rounded up) and is therefore not to be trusted. TRUE /FALSE ?
-/-
A strongman was crossing a ridge
Carrying a stove, a duck, and a fridge
When an old lady flew past
(Carrying all the troubles of the world upon her shoulders)
For her shoulders were vast
And the strong(ish)man did his strength then abridge!
-/-
September as a month is quite short
But, as they say, it’s better a witty retort
Than a month in a tort
Or a case of Sneezlewort
For putting those days in – whilst in port.
-/-
There are only 5 Factumondoes about Limericks. TRUE /FALSE ?
-/-
A Limerick walked into a bargain basement
“I’ve come about my temporary placement!”
They said “You’re too short!
But, any storm in a port,
You’ll do till we can find a replacement!
-/-
Thank you for reading these Limericks, I say,
These five-lined behemoths wot I wrote every which way
I did so all through September
And I hope some you’ll remember
As there’s a quiz on them a week Saturday!
The ‘Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Celidh’*
In Scotland they have one almost daily
But elsewhere it’s rare
To dance, with nae a care,
The whirl and the jig rather gaily!-
–
*If you then sang out “Is it too late to say I’m sorry?” you get bonus points from me.
-/-
In the depths of the ocean there lies
A creature with a dozen small eyes
It is an iiiiiiiiiiicklius!
-/-
The crew of a boat on the sea
Only had one fish for their tea
The captain had taught
To throw back what you’d caught
And, not to keep that many, you see!
-/-
Gravity was a wonderful discovery
Without it we’d never drop a herring in a shrubbery
For fear it might fly
Right up to the sky
Though the flying fish is said to be lovely.
-/-
At the edge of the world is a sign
And a narrow white unbroken line
The sign it says ‘Stop!’
You must – or you’ll drop
But, if you turn back, I’m sure you’ll be fine.
-:-
A professor from Limerick University
Was studying biodiversity
His students were divided
And opinions collided
Which made it seem a hundred times worsity!
-/-
The ‘Alternative Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Applause’
A show of hands that signify ‘fors’
But, if silence reigns,
Cools the blood in your veins,
Perhaps they ‘are’ fans, but, not yours!
-/-
When night falls bleak upon the land
And on your shoulder there is a hand
You must not cry
Best not to die
Just uppercut them and hope they understand.
-/-
Topsy-Turvy Limerick
In a fairy tale fine
On some such a line
At midnight a sonnet turned into a Limerick
The watchers were amazed – some felt quite sick –
And a few even thought it divine.
-:-
A mouse collecting rice for her young
Heard a sad song so softly sung
“A time to learn
Turn, turn, and turn”
And far away a church-bell was rung.
-/-
The music of the world is loud
The people of the world are proud
The music loud
The people proud
In Limericks this sort of thing is just not allowed!
-/-
Boys are bad and girls are good
This is not the truth! Is that understood?
Some girls are terrors;
And some lads make ‘no’ errors
But, they would do if they could!
-/-
A Limerick went to college to learn
Went once, then didn’t return;
A letter was sent
To ask his intent
The Limerick replied: “Why the concern?”
-/-
The end of the day is so near
That the night it just waits to appear
For those darkened hours
Have magical powers;
So at dusk the meek disappear.
-:-
A Limerick in
A Haiku just doesn’t seem
To be right at all.
-/-
A Bonus Haiku-type Limerick
Doric Poetry,
From Aberdeen’s stone city –
Granite Verse for thee!
Gratis, complimentary;
There is no payee.
-/-
Posted in Funny, graemesandford, hangerfarmpoets, Limerick, poem, Poetry, September
Tagged #hangerfarmpoets, #Limericks, #SeptemberLimericks, @HolisticMoon, @poemmegroup, infograe, Poem, Poetry, September
The Way of the Limerick
–
The first line is always the worst;
Then the second line, which quickly follows the first;
Then is the third
The forth is then heard
And to come last the fifth line is eternally cursed!
-/-
The ‘Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Euphoric!!!
Which in Aberdeen is spoken in Doric
So, in the Aberdonian ‘Play of the Day’ which is…
Hamlet; Hamlet doth say:
(To Horatio): ‘Alas, puir Yorick!”*
* (From Willam Shakespeare’s Danish Play -Aberdeen Ed. ‘Alas, puir Yorick, Ah kent heem, Horatio; a fellaw ay infinite jest.’
-:-
A statue from Central Aberdeen
One night was sprayed fluorescent green
The police were confused
The public amused
But, to so paint the Prince Albert ‘was’ mean!
-/-
Whilst piloting Flight 612
The captain discovered a screw
Laying loose on the floor
Then he found three screws more
Then his false leg fell off – over Crewe!
-/-
The end of the world is Nigh!
So come let us all say goodbye!
“Cheerio!”
“Time to go!”
“We’re all of us going to die…!”… eventually!
-/-
The man who is writing these words
Refuses point-blank to shoot birds
Clay pigeons – yes.
He has pacifist aims, I guess
And he’s a poet, so he’s one of the nerds!
-/-
A Scotsman was wearing a quilt
Because of the food he had Spilt
It covered his knees,
his ankles, phalanges;
But, it nowhere near covered his guilt!*
(*at not wearing a kilt!)
-/-
The ‘Alternative Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Mistaken’
For I can’t understand what you mean by ‘taekin?
Am I ‘taekin’ two yews?
I’m not, please excuse –
I’m from the South, where old Daleks are all but forsaken!*
* It may help you to understand the above to know that it was written in Aberdeen where I had the great delight of having a conversation with a local chappie last night who clearly thought that he made perfect sense – I only heard that he was suffering from Hay-Fever (and not from visiting the Theatre) and that explained his situation. I think a fine 12-year-old Hay-Fever was more likely! I’m from the very south of England.
Whilst writing a few of the above
The writer thought about his true love
At home with the pets
He hopes that she gets
A laugh from some of the above!
(to Jane x)
-/-
Posted in Funny, graemesandford, hangerfarmpoets, infograe, Limerick, limericks, mad, poem, Poetry, September
Tagged #hangerfarmpoets, #Limericks, #SeptemberLimericks, @baffled, @HolisticMoon, @poemmegroup, @thearthousecafe, Funny, infograe, Poem, Poetry
 | Cynthia Praski on SoCS – Tape – #4… |
 | Words from a Lentil… on SoCS – Tape – #4… |
| Cynthia Praski on SoCS – Tape – #4… |
| Words from a Lentil… on SoCS – Tape – #4… |
| Cynthia Praski on SoCS – Tape – #4… |
Graeme Sandford 