Thursday Throwback – You are the audience – from over three years ago!

You are the audience


are the audience;



am the poet

(If you are, at any stage of my act, amused – please show it –

if you have any overripe fruit

I ask you, please,

‘not’ to

throw it),

and we should get on fine.

These poems,

that I am about to perform,

are all mine;

unless they stink,

in which case, ‘Wordsworth’ wrote them in indelible ink.

I begin this evening’s performance

with a poem that has an overlong title;

but considerably few ‘actual’ words in it.

This poem is called, ‘What chance have you got, when the world gives you lemons, and oranges are the only fruit?’

Vitamin C



to me.

And here I do the universal gesture for ‘my current poem has finished’ (puts arms to side like a poorly Harrier Jump Jet), please be clapping or raucously ‘cheering’ but only for two point four seconds, as I have a schedule to keep to’.

Thank you.

My second poem… of twenty – just joking! – is called, ‘Whither did you come from, my love; and was there a stork or a gooseberry bush involved?’

I looked upon your face,

and paused;

three hours later, sad to say,

I remembered what it was I’d caused,

found the remote control,

and pressed ‘play’ –

you were not at all impressed.


10 responses to “Thursday Throwback – You are the audience – from over three years ago!

  1. This is so sad. Why is there over 1,000 followers on your blog and so few people stop and read?

    • They have become immune to the quaint charm that my poetry might have. And because I don’t generally do “proper” poetry. Who knows if all those followers still exist? They might have all been lost in a traumatic speed-reading incident. G:)

      • I think my followers have dropped off the planet. During Covid my publisher for my 2 books died. The partner lost his wife then he died too. I only had 2 books. There were thousands of poets and writers who have published way more than me and they have lost there books too.

      • Lost books are not good – do you not have copies? Could they not be republished by a new publisher?

        Sadly, a lot of good people have been lost during the Covid times.

        Jane and I are self-publishing to Amazon – have you got copies of mine yet, I could send you some author copies. Or you could just read the 14,000 items on WordPress! G:)

      • I had only just updated language for my team book so I have the latest PDF. I have about 6 hard-copies of each of my poetry book and teen book. The publishers website is shut down. I’m hoping that once the solicitors for their estate/will is finalised we will all at least receive some feedback.

        Yes, my poetry book poetry and devotions I’m publishing on Wednesdays and Thursdays mostly. I have had a few followers request it.
        Amazon has dropped my books because they can’t get them. I went P.O.D after I sold the first 5,000 of each.

        I’d love to read your books. Hard copies might be to costly for postal services but I can still read on WordPress.

      • Two of mine are available on Amazon as Kindle downloads – some of the old poems – but with editing – and some newer ones, then short stories that had a special bout of editing for publishing.

        At least you have copies / options of your words – and hopes for access to come.

        My Bardly Writ book is available as a free download from the link on my WordPress front page or my site – that really needs Vol. 2 to accompany it – hopefully this year. And more poetry / short story books also to come this year.

        My what a lot of actual writing we are doing.

        Take care, enjoy the moments. G:)

      • Thanks. My husband has a kindle so I might ask him to download for me.

        Good night. Bedtime here but still too warm.

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