As I was going to…

As I was going to….

St. Ive,

I taught myself to crochet, weave;

handicrafts I found to be,

so easy, when applied to me;

I sewed and knitted, bedspread squares,

all manner of clothing that a baby wears;

tablecloths, tea-towels, coffee-pot covers,

and penis-sheaths for erotique lovers,

in sizes ranging 1 to 11;

my best seller: the number 7;

and then there is the merkin range

which keeps selling out fast,

which isn’t that strange,

they are built to last,

and they keep out the mange.

As I was going to St. Ive,

I considered all the products

that I could conceive.

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