As I was going to….
St. Ive,
I taught myself to crochet, weave;
handicrafts I found to be,
so easy, when applied to me;
I sewed and knitted, bedspread squares,
all manner of clothing that a baby wears;
tablecloths, tea-towels, coffee-pot covers,
and penis-sheaths for erotique lovers,
in sizes ranging 1 to 11;
my best seller: the number 7;
and then there is the merkin range
which keeps selling out fast,
which isn’t that strange,
they are built to last,
and they keep out the mange.
As I was going to St. Ive,
I considered all the products
that I could conceive.
Graeme Sandford 