Monthly Archives: March 2020

The Sadness of Sardines

I don’t really know

how a sardine feels;

or any fish,

if truth be told;

but I’m sure they’re fine

whilst swimming around;

but, when crammed in a tin,

like… well, tightly,

I bet they’re not so happy.

Lockdown Diary

Lockdown, Day 1

Diary entry:

Stocked up with lots of food,

should be a doddle.

Lockdown, Day 2

Diary entry:

Ran out of chocolate eggs,

damn this cruel lockdown.

Lockdown, Day 153

Diary entry:

I ate my left foot, today;

it was less than nice.

Lockdown, Day 413

Diary entry:

just a whoosh of tumbleweed,

and all blank pages

Mrs Pearsons Cottage (Unvisited)

I’ve never been there,

and I know not what

there is there;

so if you are to visit,

is it safe?

I don’t know.

Are you as stray as a waif?

Can you cope with the unknown?

Should you go accompanied upon the piano,

or sole mio alone?

But, if you do go,

please report back,

whether it is, ‘hurrah! hooray!’

or, ‘alas! alack!’

Mrs Pearsons Cottage

is an enigma,

wrapped inside a conundrum,

coated with an oriental mystery sauce.

Mrs Pearsons Cottage

Mrs Pearsons Cottage (Revisited)

is the cottage

where all the Mrs Pearsons go,

if there’s ever a missing person,

by the name of Mrs Pearson;

that, is where she’s sure to go.

For Mrs Pearson Cottage (2018 version) clink link below.

Mrs Pearsons Cottage (2018)

Haiku? Myth or fact?

Just a few small words put in a certain order can make a haiku.

(as exampled below)

Just a few small words

put in a certain order

can make a haiku.

I thought I saw a polar bear

I was paranoid

about a polar bear,

I took a Polaroid

but he wasn’t there,

he broke my camera,

I was quite annoyed,

and I was taken into care.

Once, I was a dinosaur,

then I was petrified,

I couldn’t bear

to have you by my side,

I was afraid,

then, of a meteor,

I thought it laughed,

I could not be sure.

And now, The Chorus:

All those things

happened in the past,

when I was younger,

and we had a blast.

All those things

happened long ago,

when I was a dinosaur,

and a cameraman…

traipsing in the snow.

Will & Ben – Renaissance Men

Will: I sent Ben out, yesterday, in order to get me a new quill for my writings. I carefully wrote my requirement down on a scrap of parchment for him – he has the dull memory of a golden fish – and off he went. When he returneth, he had purchased for me, forsooth, a brand new, second-hand quilt – at a considerable cost – I asked Ben for an explanation. He said that, in the market, he had read my list – of 1 item – and thought that I had written ‘quilt’. He, is a dullard. And I suppose that I am now to be known as ‘Wilt’ Shakespeare.