Saintly Places (In Cornwall)
As I was going to St. Ives
I met a cat
with seven lives…
left.
As I was going to St. Ives
(Pronounced ‘Eves’)
I met a man
who tried to sell me fallen leaves.
I told him that I
Would just not buy
his sob story
and so he left me high
and dry-eyed.
As I was
going
to St. Just,
I had to go there
had to
must
have been about half way there, when
I remembered
I’d been there before;
so, I just didn’t go there once again.
As I was going to St. Mawes
I swotted up on local laws
And found that I
should wear a tie
if ever I should sing a lullaby…
upon a tandem;
that law to me seemed quite random.
As I was going to St. Austell
or as locals say ‘Off to Stozzke!’
for a nozzle for my can
because I am a watering man,
It rained upon my open plan.
As I was going to St. Aggie’s
I met an abrupt lack of a rhyme…
that sort of thing
happens to me
from time to time.
I didn’t bother with St. Erth
and their dubious tale
of a Virgin Berth;
I didn’t even have a boat –
so needed nowhere for it to float.
Saintly places still I have to visit
St. Pinnock
St. Neots, is it?
St. Teath
St. Wenn
and all the rest
I’ll go to them all one day
and maybe I will wear a vest.