Monthly Archives: May 2018

I saw a stonechat the other day;

it went on and on and on,

until… I rolled if down the hill

that we were stood upon.

It may have kept chatting,

I know not;

but, it probably gathered no moss.

I am a harvester of combinations.

No, not the undergarments –

that would be extremely silly.

I gather the combinations from safes and locks.

’What is the point?’

I hear you ask.

’Everybody must have a hobby.’

I reply, with a degree of certainty –

rather than the degree of uncertainty

that I normally assume.

’Weirdo!’ you throw in my direction,

with all the mockery that you can muster.

’I’m not a ’weirdo’ I’m a ’nerd’ ’

I attempt correction;

but, knock me down with a feather duster,

you have gone, and didn’f hear my response.

I sigh a sigh,

and,

by and by,

continue on.

We walked along a pretty street,

the scent of Spring around our feet,

and with the sight of verdant roses,

the aromas did assault our noses.

”Plant a banana!” she said to me.

Well, that’s what I thought she said – I was only half awake, and only half of that was listening.

”I shall!” I replied, with just a hint of Potassium and a modest soupçon of Irony on the side.

I did. And wasn’t surprised when it bloomed in the night; because, I wasn’t there to see such a sight.

”You fool!” she cried, tears in her eyes – I’d wound her up quite a bit.

”You’re a silly banana!” she said with a shake; then she split.

The Ballad of Caoimhe and Saoirse.

Caoimhe:

Unpronounceable,

that’s what you are to me,

unpronounceable,

Too many syllablesy

unpronounceable, you.

Saiorse:

Unpronounceable,

that’s what you are to me,

unpronounceable,

too much syllabilty,

you’re unpronounceable, too.

Both:

Unpronounceable, you.

I didn’t wander lonely, I’m a clod;

just soil beneath unbroken sod,

I’ve never seen a cloud above,

tasted air, fallen in love;

I wait here with my senses numb,

down-trodden, hidden, non-sentient, dumb.

‘So, how can you write a poem?’ you ask.

I must admit, it was no easy task;

I started off with one small word;

then added all the rest you’ve heard.