At Bertram’s Hotel

It always feels like

Miss Marple’s watching me

(Giving me the third degree)

It always feels like

That old biddy’s watching me

(Putting the police onto me)

At Bertram’s Hotel

A Murder is announced,

There’s a body in the library,

And I’m the main suspect,

I have no alibi,

And a track record.

I also served time eating porridge

Three long years

Or bears.

Anyway, I haven’t lost my Marples

I’m just being watched by Jane

and being driven insane.

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