#SoCS Oct. 28/17 – Which/Witch/Wich

#SoCS Oct. 28/17 – Which/Witch/Wich

Linda’s back with another great #SoCS prompt!

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “which/witch/wich.” Start your post with the word “which” and try to fit the word “witch” in somewhere if you can. Bonus points if you use a word that ends in “wich.” As an added rule this week, you will lose all the points you’ve ever earned if you type “which witch is which” anywhere in your post. Have fun!

Thanks to Linda for the prompt and to Ritu for the prod.
My #SoCS is not finished – but, it was written in a gloop of writing yesterday (Saturday) and I thought that you might like to have a ramble through it. G:)

The Old Witch Who Lives in the Old Cottage at the Old Edge of the Old Woods

It’s nearly one o’clock on the edge of the old forest (and almost that time elsewhere, too)
SFX Sounds of cooking (it is a bubbling ‘witches’ broth’)
A. Witch: Dum-de-dum, de-dum-de-dum, it’s one o’clock and time for lunch…
A. Witch (to self): Ah, I know what I like in ‘your’ wardrobe, Mr. Gabriel.
SFX Doorbell rings (but, it is a strange sound as of a doorbell that a witch might have)
A Witch: Coming! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah (like a creaky door). 
SFX unbolting and opening of door.
SFX door creaking open (but delayed due to a slight temporal time warp).
A Witch: Hello, young man. What can A. Witch do for you on this cold and lonely night?
Man: Are you the witch?
A. Witch: I am ‘A’ Witch. I can’t claim to be ‘the’ witch – there are many, many witches, which is to say, I am one of many, and not ‘the’ only one. When all other witches have been cast into their final bubbling cauldron, and only one last witch remains, then ‘she’ shall be ‘The’ witch.
Man: Yes, I see; but, are you ‘the’ old witch that lives in the old cottage on the old edge of ‘that’ old village?
A. Witch: Well, yes, I am that ‘the’ witch. What did you want, old man?
Man: What I want is- did you say ‘old man’? You said ‘young man’ earlier.
A. Witch: I did; but, time is fleeting and madness takes it’s toll you know?
Man: I see, once more, that ‘madness’ is rife in your little world between the village and the wild wood.
A. Witch. It’s high-tide, mid-afternoon, most people just fly by, if they have a broom.
Man: Oh. Is that so? How interesting. But, I really need your help.
A. Witch: You need me?
Man: I need somebody; and not just anybody. Can you please, please help me?
A. Witch: I can help you get your feet off the ground. There’s ‘always’ room on my broom
Man: No, that’s not what I need.
A. Witch: Then tell me what it is or I shall have to turn you into a newt – I do need the eye of a newt for my ‘recipe’ to be complete.
Man: No, please don’t turn me into a newt. 
A. Witch: You could be my newt – which is extremely tiny! My newt! Minute! Get it?
Man: Yes. Do you suppose that we could be serious for a moment?
A. Witch: I can but try. What. Do. You. Need. Help. With?
Man: In the town where I was born lived a man who sailed to sea – it is ‘he’ that I need help with!
A. Witch: In what way do you need help? You have to be more… specific! Details are everything!
Man: He is about six foot tall; has two feet on the end of his legs (one to each side); a black beard that is ‘so’ long, that he keeps in a box; wears a pirate’s garb (his clothes, that is); and answers to the name of ‘da da daaaaaaaan!’
SD There is a pause.
A. Witch: Answers to what, exactly?
Man: Da da daaaaaaaan! It’s what he calls himself. I think it’s long for ‘Dan’, which I hear is short for… ‘dan gerous’.
A. Witch: Oh, a pirate. Why didn’t you say? I have a good spell; no, a fine spell, indeed, for pirates – it makes them seasick and yearn for dry land. Most effective.
Man: That’s not the problem.
A. Witch: It isn’t?
Man: No. 
A. Witch: You are not the most helpful being when it comes to getting to the point, are you?
Man: It has been said.
A. Witch: I have a very important potion brewing within a restless cauldron; if you can’t get to the point at once, I shall have to point you to the door.
Man: Okay. Da da daaaaaaaan has stolen my girl’s heart.
A. Witch: Oooh, messy!
Man: No, he has showered her with gold from his plundering; and jewels from his plundering; and, now, kisses from his-
A. Witch: Plundering?
Man: No? Lips. And she has fallen in love with someone she shouldn’t have.
A. Witch: Never!
Man: Yes, it is so. She has fallen in love with someone-
A. Witch: Da da daaaaaaaan?
Man: Yes, fallen in love with someone-
A. Witch: Da da daaaaaaan the pirate?
Man: Yes. She has fallen in love with-
A. Witch: Someone she shouldn’t have.
Man: Precisely.
A. Witch: Well, thanks be that we got there at last. I also have a potion that can make a man forget.
Man: But ‘she’ is unforgettable!
A. Witch: That’s what ‘you’ are to me. However, for a fee, I shall make you up that potion and you shall never remember her again.
Man: Right! Oh, hold on; I don’t want to forget her.
A. Witch: It’s much easier that way. I can make you forget ‘everything!’
Man: Ummm, well…

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