The Joyful Journeyings of One Bertram Bumble (part 1)

The humble Bertram Bumble

Was all of a fumble

He didn’t know what to do.

He’d got on a train

In the downpouring rain

And ended up in Seaton… or Crewe

(When he really wanted a day out in Looe – in lieu of a day in ‘the’ loo).

He’d arrived at four-thirty,

Tired and dirty,

And had searched for the seafront and gulls

But, to his great surprise

The signs were all lies

And they told him he’d landed near Hull.

When he realised his error

He cried out in terror:

“I’m not in Heaven, Carew!”

Upon which declaration,

Spoken forth to the nation,

The nation’s elation was diminished an iota

(Or two).


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