The Way of the Limerick
The first line is always the worst;
Then the second line, which quickly follows the first;
Then is the third
The forth is then heard
And to come last the fifth line is eternally cursed!
The ‘Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Euphoric!!!
Which in Aberdeen is spoken in Doric
So, in the Aberdonian ‘Play of the Day’ which is…
Hamlet; Hamlet doth say:
(To Horatio): ‘Alas, puir Yorick!”*
* (From Willam Shakespeare’s Danish Play -Aberdeen Ed. ‘Alas, puir Yorick, Ah kent heem, Horatio; a fellaw ay infinite jest.’
A statue from Central Aberdeen
One night was sprayed fluorescent green
The police were confused
The public amused
But, to so paint the Prince Albert ‘was’ mean!
Whilst piloting Flight 612
The captain discovered a screw
Laying loose on the floor
Then he found three screws more
Then his false leg fell off – over Crewe!
The end of the world is Nigh!
So come let us all say goodbye!
“Time to go!”
“We’re all of us going to die…!”… eventually!
The man who is writing these words
Refuses point-blank to shoot birds
Clay pigeons – yes.
He has pacifist aims, I guess
And he’s a poet, so he’s one of the nerds!
A Scotsman was wearing a quilt
Because of the food he had Spilt
It covered his knees,
his ankles, phalanges;
But, it nowhere near covered his guilt!*
(*at not wearing a kilt!)
The ‘Alternative Word of the Day’ it is… ‘Mistaken’
For I can’t understand what you mean by ‘taekin?
Am I ‘taekin’ two yews?
I’m not, please excuse –
I’m from the South, where old Daleks are all but forsaken!*
* It may help you to understand the above to know that it was written in Aberdeen where I had the great delight of having a conversation with a local chappie last night who clearly thought that he made perfect sense – I only heard that he was suffering from Hay-Fever (and not from visiting the Theatre) and that explained his situation. I think a fine 12-year-old Hay-Fever was more likely! I’m from the very south of England.
Whilst writing a few of the above
The writer thought about his true love
At home with the pets
He hopes that she gets
A laugh from some of the above!
(to Jane x)