September is the Limerickest Month! (14th’s offerings)



The word of the day is… alone

Even in a crowd it’s on its own;

It feels set apart,

Has an ache in its heart,

And resides in an exclusion zone.


There may have been an illusionist from Penge

Who created an illusion quite strange

with mirrors and smoke

Until he started to choke

And toppled like a stone from Stonehenge.


A book of Limericks may seem inviting

Different, risqué, quite exciting

But after a few

You’ll find something to do

That is more wholesome, and far less like fleas biting!


The ‘Alternative Word of the Day’ is… LOVE;

LOVE is all around, There is LOVE below and LOVE is above;

LOVE is… here,

LOVE is… there,

LOVE is… every everywhere;

And when push comes to shove:

All you need is… LOVE…

An Oxygen/Nitrogen enriched atmosphere…





I’m one clown shy of a circus;

One sandwich short of a picnic

One circus-shy clown

one picnic-short sandwich

I’m one… and that’s a fact!


Hanger Farm Poets

Are a fine bunch of ‘all-know-its’

But I caused a bit of a to-do

When I mentioned ‘Clerihew!’

(Which has no fifth line – so it confuses some poets!)


On the train from Cardiff to Crewe

There was a bit of a do

Someone had cake

and a strawberry milkshake

One Happy Meal fed a hundred and two!


Yesterday’s word was ‘rambunctious’

And tomorrow’s is ‘proselytize’

And the way things are going,

There’s no way of knowing,

If learning them will make me wise.

But, I’ll try and remember their meanings,

Though some of them just won’t be learnt,

I’ll say them by rote,

Put some in a quote

And the difficult ones… will get burnt!


Another Different Format Limerick (basically, it resembles a Limerick slightly, but isn’t one)

I can tune my guitar in a minute

I know that there’s not a lot in it

some of the strings, are not that far out,

I’ll just be…ever so, very, a little bit, slightly… out of key… with the band…

(I hope) they’ll understand.


(and another…)

I am not worthy:

I suffer from poetry scurvy!

Too many times

I have forsaken the rhymes

That to me are like limes.




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