There was a young girl who loved RICE MILKS
And you know she liked A RAG MAN’S tattoo
She thought the word ‘Play’ was fun
And loved the bite of a pun;
She’d be happy with half an Haiku.
Half an h
aiku, will o
There once was a man who loved coffee
Flavoured with vanilla, caramel, hazelnut… and toffee
He liked it so sweet
That its calories beat
Those of a pie called banoffee.
The word of the day it is ‘Prurient!’
A feeling that is rather luxuriant
The look in your eyes,
Your silky inner thighs,
And the mutual way we’re exploriant!
There was a young fisherman called Kevin
To whom the sea was his ultimate heaven
He’d sail in his boat
Always happy afloat
And his hours were twenty-four seven.
Awash with the joy of a boat and a net
The spray of the ocean, the loss of a debt
He’d haul in a catch
No quotas to match
Whilst singing sea shanties you’d never forget.
There once was a Bursledon Brick
Whose facets were unusually slick
Not rugged and rough –
The others were tough –
But he had his own Limerick.
There once was a podiatrist named Hector
Who treated a Police Chief Inspector,
The policeman’s flat feet
Were from his years on the beat
So Hector the podiatrist fitted the Police Chief Inspector with a low-arch corrector and that seemed to do the trick.
There once was a gasman named Colin
Who kept digging then filling a hole in
When asked why he did
When he did what he did
He said I’m trying to prove that the earth taken from a hole will fit back in that hole and that the quantity of removed earth from the hole is not swollen.
#Limerick #Limericks #SeptemberLimericks #hods